Saturday, March 13, 2010

Bloomberg & Klein Close Down The Large Overcrowded "Rubber Rooms" & Create Mini For-Profit "Rubber Rooms".









This just in and is an exclusive by Chaz. Mayor Michael Bloomberg & Chancellor Joel Klein have decided to close down the large and overcrowded "rubber rooms" in New York City and will allow their well-connected friends to open up for-profit mini reassignment centers where there will each have two "Leadership Academy" administrators and a carefully selected group of reassigned teachers (no more than 25 per site) who will be worked to exhaustion with the tremendous amount of paperwork generated by those non-educators at Tweed. The motto for these mini "rubber rooms" will be "work will set you free". Where did I hear that before? hmmmm. Anyway the CEO's who run the for-profit mini "rubber rooms" will be allowed to select up to 25 reassigned teachers of their choice after interviewing them. Excluded from the interview process will be those teachers subject to felony charges, whistle blowers, union representatives, bloggers, teachers who dare read the blogs,and teachers who have time and attendance charges filed against them.

The teachers selected must expect to work an expanded day from 7:30am to 6:00pm with only a half hour lunch. Further, the selected reassigned teacher must "volunteer" his or her services two Saturdays a month to handle excess paperwork generated by Tweed in their ever failing attempt to get it right but always getting it wrong. Failure to show up on voluntary Saturdays will result in the reassigned teacher to be transferred to the large holding cell being built by Tweed under their building. Moreover, any teacher that fails to meet their quota will be further charged with "neglect of duty" and "insubordination". Finally, if the teacher does not meet the Administrator's arbitrary definition of quality, an "incompetence" charge will be added to the reassigned teacher's 3020-a charges.

Teachers excluded from the mini "rubber room" selection process or not selected will have a special place set up for them. These reassigned teachers will be put into the large holding cell in the basement of the Tweed building and shovel coal to keep the Tweed building warm. Any teacher that refuses to shovel coal will be removed from the payroll and forfeit their health benefits.

Oh god! What a nightmare I had. No teacher due process rights. "arbitrary & capricious" judgement by administrators who never taught in the classroom and clueless & vindictive non-educators running the system. Wait a minute it was not a nightmare it is really happening. It is real. God help us all in the New York City teaching profession.

10 comments:

Invictus said...

I wonder where fiction will meet reality.....in this case, fictional scenarios might be a degree away from reality.

Chaz, did you have this idea "patented" in order to profiteer from it?

I have no doubt that some automaton from Tweet or Bloom und Klein INC are reading it and will propose it in their next meeting. Some brainless tomaton will declare it as the greatest thing since the discovery of fire!

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Anonymous said...

I read it, believed it, and it will eventually happen. You're the Edutradamas and your prediction may come true especially since Klein's intentions are very clear.

I hope you are wrong - which I doubt it.

Klein's ultimate goal is to make RubberRoom teachers indenture workers. If they slip up because of exhausting, overwhelming work, Klein will have the excuse of terminating them.

Jeezs, what happened to our professional? It has gotten to the point where my friends, who are teachers too, and I don't want to even mention our profession. There's this terrible stigma over our profession and that's what people are perceiving.

Damn you, Klein!!

Chaz said...

I am sure we all realize my post was tongue in cheek. However, I admit it comes uncomfortably close to the truth after reading the DOE contract proposals.

jd2718 said...

Too close to reality.

Anonymous said...

I've been pondering about this quiet much... it sure raises a few questions..
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Invictus said...

Chaz, whether you had a forewarning of these craziness being floated around or you are a true Cassandra. Either way, you rock.

NYC Educator said...

Maybe they could start charter rubber rooms. They could have higher budgets, snacks from Fresh Direct, purple bathrooms, and Smartboards.

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